Why don't Indian marriages fail?
How many of your friends' parents have had failed marriages? I pose this rhetorical question for the lack of statistics, as a way to convince you, how we are a country where marriages are forever. Compare this with the west, where marriage is just the beginning to an uncertain relationship, and one that fails more often than not. But why?
It would be naive to oversimplify matters, and ascribe this to one particular reason. However, clearly the main reason lies in the way we have been brought up. Let me elucidate.
A majority of us have never gotten into relationships. Not because we don't want to. But because we've had hardly had the opportunity to interact with someone so much so that we get into one. This, because of the stigma that Indians still associate with such an interaction. This might sound ridiculous to the lucky few who do not belong to such an unfortunate lot. But I have excluded such few people from my discussion for the sake of generalization. Yeah, so getting back to the point. As a result, the girl/boy that I marry is the first one that I've ever had the opportunity to get into a relationship with. Now comes the interesting part. Because of the sheer lack of the experience and emotional maturity that comes with indulging into relationships, I have no benchmarks. I have no expectations. I do not need "space". I cannot say that he/she is better or worse than the last one I had. I adjust to his/her shortcomings thinking that these are but inevitable. I've never shared my love with anyone. So the storehouse of love that has been created, I give all to him/her. Nobody has ever loved and cared for me this way, I am not used to such treatment. And so he/she becomes my soul-mate, someone without whom, I cannot think to live without. As a result, even if I somehow do manage to get into one relationship at some stage in my life, it probably culminates into an eternal marriage.
This is why these relationships work so well. Coming to think of it, the walls that our society has created between the two sexes, has worked in its own favor.
It would be naive to oversimplify matters, and ascribe this to one particular reason. However, clearly the main reason lies in the way we have been brought up. Let me elucidate.
A majority of us have never gotten into relationships. Not because we don't want to. But because we've had hardly had the opportunity to interact with someone so much so that we get into one. This, because of the stigma that Indians still associate with such an interaction. This might sound ridiculous to the lucky few who do not belong to such an unfortunate lot. But I have excluded such few people from my discussion for the sake of generalization. Yeah, so getting back to the point. As a result, the girl/boy that I marry is the first one that I've ever had the opportunity to get into a relationship with. Now comes the interesting part. Because of the sheer lack of the experience and emotional maturity that comes with indulging into relationships, I have no benchmarks. I have no expectations. I do not need "space". I cannot say that he/she is better or worse than the last one I had. I adjust to his/her shortcomings thinking that these are but inevitable. I've never shared my love with anyone. So the storehouse of love that has been created, I give all to him/her. Nobody has ever loved and cared for me this way, I am not used to such treatment. And so he/she becomes my soul-mate, someone without whom, I cannot think to live without. As a result, even if I somehow do manage to get into one relationship at some stage in my life, it probably culminates into an eternal marriage.
This is why these relationships work so well. Coming to think of it, the walls that our society has created between the two sexes, has worked in its own favor.
posted by Savi at 5:32 AM
7 Comments:
I do not need "space".
LMFAO!!
hmm.. good perspective.. never thought this way :)
So the Indian way has its merits as well :) I always thought it was the most stupid way in the world.. but it is not :D (thank god.. for I see no chance of going the western way)
:P
bulls-eye
Kuch god hai bhai!
Something for the unfortunate to cheer about :D
i've got few more things to add here. nonetheless I firmly agree with your contentions.
yeah !
Bull's Eye :)
Well how can you be in a relationship if you believe that there might be someone better out there...Guess our system works out well finally if one subscribes to it.
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